By JIMMY D / High ankle sprains and other fantasy pains | Jimmy's archive

Injuries can be a real pain.

You carefully structure your fantasy roster, make trades based on your needs and surpluses and manage based on the presumed health of your players. When you suffer the kind of injury that people giggle at, it’s more painful than funny.

Jimmy is not speaking of the injuries to Sidney Crosby or Daniel Alfredsson this week, as both were fairly normal ankle and hip injuries. While potentially disastrous to your fantasy roster, they did not make owners shake their heads with bizarre disgust like this one did for Jimmy.

Denver Nugget power forward Kenyon Martin is always an injury risk with a rebuilt knee. But this week’s footnote was a real pain in the butt.

“Martin missed the Nuggets’ 104-93 loss to Atlanta on Tuesday after having a staph infection on his buttock treated before the game.”

In layman terms, he has missed three games and cost Jimmy the rebounding category in his hoops head-to-head league because of a cut on the butt.
On the same day, Jimmy spied this gem from the newswire that was even more painful.

A robber in Indiana apparently stuffed a handgun into the waistband of his pants after demanding cash from a clerk, but suddenly doubled over after the weapon fired. He fled and was arrested a short time later with a gunshot wound to his right testicle and lower left leg. He was released from the hospital and charged armed robbery and criminal recklessness.

Presumably, he will be given a 30-day IQ assessment to determine if he is bright enough to stand trial.

Lowdown on high ankle sprains

You think your fantasy stud is a big sissy because a little ankle sprain is keeping him out of the lineup for more than a month? That’s what Sid Crosby is staring at and he doesn’t need to look far to see proof that the injury – a high ankle sprain - is a real pain.

Marc-Andre Fleury suffered one six weeks ago and trainers immediately set a six to eight-week return date. He still feels pain and may not play for another month.

You play NFL pools? You know the pain of losing Jags QB David Garrard, Bills RB Marshawn Lynch and Cowboy WR Terrell Owens. Same injury.
Just what the heck is a high ankle sprain? Let Dr. Jimmy (with some help from about.com’s resident orthopedic dude) explain.

A regular ankle sprain is caused when ligaments surrounding the ankle joint are ripped or stretched. It swells up and hurts a lot, but heals fairly quickly and can be wrapped or braced.

The high sprain is an injury to the sydesmotic ligament that connects the tibia and fibula in the lower leg. In severe cases, a screw is inserted to hold the bones together for three months while that ligament heals.

Fleury told reporters this week the ankle still hurts. Fortunately for the Pens (and for you if you scooped him off the scrap heap a month ago), backup Ty Conklin is 10-0-1 since taking over. And Dany Sabourin just pitched a shutout Saturday in Montreal, a game attended by many Maritimers hoping to see Crosby play.
Bummer.

Third Tynes lucky

Jimmy hates the Giants, even though he predicted them to win the NFC (OK, enough bragging, he also pegged Jacksonville to win the AFC and we know how that one turned out).

But he was happy for kicker Lawrence Tynes who came through in OT after gagging twice in the fourth quarter. Dude was on his way to a hellish corner of the Choke Hall of Fame until he connected on a 47-yarder (the first time a field goal longer than 40 yards had ever been booted at Lambeau in the post-season).

Jimmy likes to see games won, not lost and games that make heroes, not goats.
Like the Indiana robber from earlier in the column, Brett Favre shot himself (in the foot, not the privates) by chucking that ugly pick in OT, right after winning the coin toss for a chance to get back to the Super Bowl.

Now, the big game will be a rematch of that stellar Week 17 battle that nearly ruined New England’s perfect season.

The Giants have now won 10 in a row away from the Meadowlands and Eli Manning has uncharacteristically turned the ball over zero times in three playoff road victories.

Jimmy may have a Super Bowl contest for Jimmy Nation to play. Stand by for details in next Tuesday’s column.

In the meantime, stay busy, stay lucky and stay away from high ankle sprains.

Jimmy D